Dear Stacey Dash: Until You Are 5% As Relevant As Oprah, Keep Your Mouth SHUT

Stacey Dash has opened her mouth, again. And this time, she took her unwarranted opinions to the highest celebrity power in the country.


Dash, best known for starring in Clueless and tweeting recklessly on Twitter, criticized Oprah for comparing Emmett Till and Trayvon Martin in an interview supporting her film The Butler.

You know, because the comparisons are completely unwarranted. Sigh.

Here’s my thing with Stacey Dash. It’s one thing to tweet support for the conservative party; that’s totally fine. It’s your politically ideology. But when you criticize a woman who has done nothing but OPEN DOORS for African Americans in media and entertainment (aka the industry you work in), you should have a little more respect and deference to them. ESPECIALLY when their comment wasn’t even wrong or stretch to begin with!

And plus, just to be petty, Oprah could literally buy her career ten times over, whatever’s left of it anyway, so please remain seated.


– B


Chris Brown Threatens To Quit Music Because He “Mistakenly” Beat Up Rihanna And People Are Still Mad About It

Chris Brown is upset that the general public has morals and a sense of right and wrong

This morning, pop star Chris Brown went to Twitter to complain about how the mainstream media has treated him since that infamous 2008 incident where he beat the crap out of Rihanna. He claimed that his upcoming album would be his last, because he is tired of being famous for a “mistake.”

The “mistake” being beating up Rihanna, his girlfriend.

This (which is a lot less graphic than what we’ve seen) is the mistake he was referring to:

Excuse me?

THIS is the main reason why people haven’t gotten over his assault, even if its been five years. The mere fact that Chris believes that his very deliberate domestic assault of his girlfriend was a “mistake” instead of a vicious act of violence (which it is, by the way) is problematic. It is proof that, after all of this time, he still doesn’t understand what happened and he sure as hell hasn’t taken responsibility for what happened.

But that’s not even the big issue of his “retirement” message.

Chris Brown had the pure, unmitigated gall to basically say his career was ruined by the incident. I’m sorry, what dimension is he living in? Obviously not the one where he won a Grammy for a sub-standard album, or the sold-out tours, or the hit singles, or the award performances, or the delusional fans who still excuse his assault to this day. He should’ve seen his career sink down to Atlantis, but by the grace of God (and his fans, I guess), he still managed to sell singles, albums, and concert tickets. Sure, he hasn’t seen the success of “Forever,” but he should be lucky that the industry didn’t completely blacklist him after beating the crap out of America’s pop princess.

Let’s also not forget all of his messy behavior after the fact, like throwing a chair out of the Good Morning America studios, or the continuing saga of his threesome relationship with Rihanna and Karreuche Tran, or threatening a valet because they charged him $10. He is literally the biggest mess in music (besides Justin Bieber, of course), and he has no shame about it.

So, after all of that, his successes in spite of everything he’s done, the criminal and the douchey and the intersection between the two, he has the nerve to complain?

Newsflash Chris Brown; you’re a multi-millionaire pop star who committed a terrible act of domestic violence and yet you still have girls on your jock like it’s nobody’s business (pun intended; brownie points if you know what I’m talking about). You should be skipping through a flowerbed of daisies over the success you’ve been able to have. Instead, you’re going to threaten to quit music and punish your fans?

Don’t let the door hit you on your way out, Breezy.

Oprah on The N-Word: “No One In Their Right Mind Would Try It!”


Oprah Winfrey has always been a fairly humble human being about her insurmountable status as an American billionaire icon (the status of OWN be damned).

However, as she promotes her new film The Butler, she is making it known, in case people have forgotten, that she is an American billionaire icon and she has no time for your bull or your feelings.

On Entertainment Tonight, Oprah spoke about race relations in America, particularly how Paula Deen, who she interviewed last year, was concerned. As you recall, Deen saw her empire crumble upon her admittance to using the N-word regularly.

Oprah said this about the N-word:

“Nobody in their right mind is going to call me the N-word. You know, you see those fools on Twitter sometime say ridiculous things. But nobody in their right mind is going to do that to my face, because true racism is being able to have power over somebody else. So that doesn’t happen to me that way.”

Basically, Oprah has no time for your ignorance or racism, because she could buy all of us three times over and still have enough left over to build another school in Africa to aid young girls.

Of course, I doubt Oprah means it the way I’m interpreting it (although I would give her my paycheck to say “fuck your feelings” to somebody), but it is nice to see someone who truly worked her way from nothing to become a global institution claim the hell out of it (so eff you, Rae Dawn Chong).

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Ego Reflection: Amanda Bynes Was Always Mentally Unstable, But No One Cared

Up until about a year or so ago, Amanda Bynes seemed to be a pretty well-adjusted former child star.

Sure, she was no Raven-Symone, but she surely wasn’t Lindsay Lohan either, praise God.

Then, it all went south randomly.

She got those weird cheek piercings, attacked the Obamas and Drake on Twitter, trashed hotel rooms and wore the single worst wigs in human history.

It was pretty clear, to me at least, that something wasn’t completely right in Bynes’s cranium, even though she insisted everything was okay. The media ate it up, giving her more media coverage than she saw when she was actually famous. The general public, thirsty for a public meltdown now that Charlie Sheen is chilling at FX, ignored the warning signs that something was seriously wrong with this girl. Some even thought that she was trolling all of us, making some grandiose point about the state of celebrity.

Now she’s on a 5150 psychiatric hold and has been diagnosed (kind of) as a schizophrenic, after starting a fire in a neighbor’s driveway. She’s apparently responding to medication and doing much better.

Thankfully she’s getting treatment, but it took way too long. I feel like there were not enough people questioning her behavior and calling for her to get a serious psychiatric evaluation, preferring instead to watch her unravel until it got dangerous.

Fame is a complete and utter trip, and if you don’t know how to handle it, it can lead you down some serious paths to hell (see pretty much any celebrity who has died before their time of something not an illness). We, as the public, aren’t helping matters by essentially cheering on the wackiness, even if it made for an interesting New York Post headline.

Don’t get me wrong; some people crave the attention and are just acting out to get it. But I think its time we start taking a closer look into who we are putting on the tabloid front pages, and whether something more serious is going on there.

– B

7th Heaven’s Mackenzie Rosman and Nick Jonas Prove How Thirsty The Internet Is

Remember little Ruthie on The WB’s wholesome 7th Heaven?

Remember mop-headed Nick Jonas back when he was relevant, before Justin Bieber snatched him out of the game?

Yeah, well they are both grown up and making everyone crazy with their bodies.

Rosman started the thirst when her Maxim spread was released a couple of days ago. It’s safe to say nobody was expecting the former child star to be holding so much, mmfph, for lack of a better word (that wouldn’t be disrespectful).

Then, almost automatically, Nick Jonas took to Instagram to reveal his new, gym-minted torso (with arguably the worst Instagram filter in history). Regardless of the blinding effect, the pic sent Twitter, and subsequently the Internet, into a completely and utter frenzy of lust. Hell, even Neil Patrick Harris chimed in (which, considering their ages, is more than a little inappropriate).

Anyway, kudos to Mackenzie and Nick for making everyone feel like they are probably going to jail for cradle-robbing.

Yes, I know they are both of age, but come on. You know damn well there is a part of you that remembers them like this:

Yup, we’re all going to hell.

But what a way to go….

– B

Four Signs That You’ve Pissed Off Black Twitter

Black Twitter is real, powerful and ready to strike if you do something really messy.

Ask Paula Deen, the Zimmerman juror who tried to land that book deal, Don Lemon, and most recently, that jackass from last night’s Catfish.

Basically, if you do something that could potentially anger the black community who speaks in 140 characters, you will be dragged by your roots across Twitter’s servers worldwide with not a single eff given.

And if you don’t have hair, then it will be even more painful, because you will be dragged by your scalp. Too bloody.

In fact, I would just buy a wig that could just be snatched.

Here are four signs that you have been targeted by Black Twitter:

Black Twitter Makes Calls For Your Social Media Information To Be Found

During last night’s Catfish, where Bryan proved to be a borderline sociopath on national television, there were people on Twitter demanding that someone in the Black Twitterverse find his Twitter or Facebook so that he could be dragged properly. For instance:

If Black Twitter hasn’t found your handle or Facebook page within minutes, consider yourself lucky. If they do, HIDE!

Black Twitter ATTACKS!

Now, Black Twitter has become infamous for attacking its targets with absolutely no room for pleasantries. Basically, the members of this community will come after you with a VENGEANCE!

The Hashtag That Will Shade You Straight to Hell!

Now if you’re lucky, you will just be dragged a couple of times and then it will be over. However, if you aren’t, and you REALLY piss off Black Twitter, chances are a hashtag will be created to cleverly embarrass you. All one needs to look as far as is #PaulasBestDishes ,the now iconic Twitter hashtag that may have singlehandedly ruined her career. Don Lemon was subjected to one as well, #DonLemonLogic, where Black Twitter proceeded to create scenarios that jived with Lemon’s purported views on racism.

Your Life Is Kind of Ruined

So you survived the onslaught of tweets that either outright snatched you bald or turned you into a laughingstock. Chances are, your life will never be the same. Your endorsements will be gone (Paula Deen), your respect in the community is up in flames (Don Lemon), your book deal is kaput (Zimmerman juror) and you will probably never ever get a boyfriend/girlfriend again (Bryan from Catfish).

So the moral is? Unless you are ready to be the laughingstock of social media (and BuzzFeed, which typically picks up Black Twitter stories and highlights them for the masses), don’t piss off Black Twitter!